Here’s To You Dear Lady

I saw a car yesterday with logs of driftwood strapped to the roof. I thought about her. She feared the ocean but loved its gifts; driftwood with its “smooth as an orgasm” surface, odd stones, sand crabs, water smoothed colored pieces of glass, starfish, tons and tons of seashells. Hours and hours she would scour the beach as her love fished for his dream catch. I thought about her and these were my thoughts. Working the flower beds today, I smelled the fresh wet soil. I flashed back to when I was young and working by her side in the gardens of her life, flower, vegetable, rock. She planted and tended them all. So many thoughts and memories swirl in my head. Her motherly smell when I climbed into bed with her and dad after a nightmare, what comfort and peace it brought me. Her absentminded back rubs as I stood by her side while she talked with a friend; I remember hoping she’d never notice I was standing there and let me enjoy that back scratching all day long. But after a while she’d shoo us kids away to give them some adult time. I remember the prayers she prayed with this young teen asking blessing for the future of my unborn son and me. I remember her teaching me how to care and love my baby when I was just seventeen. I remember her stepping back and letting me rise in the night to diaper and feed and rock my crying babe. I know she loved me enough to allow me to be the only mother of my son. I remember her. I love her. She’s the background to my whole life. Here’s to you dear lady, I’m missing you, wishing you were by my side digging the rich soils in the gardens of my life.

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